Every relationship is unique. We all go through the ups and downs, and whether you’ve been together 12 months, 5 years, or for over a decade, it can be easy to fall into a rut. But like anything of value, we have to take responsibility for the state of our partnerships and use our power and our being to create excitement, joy, and happiness that will continue forever.

Romantic relationships require ongoing attention and commitment for love to flourish. As long as the health of your relationship remains important to you, it is going to require your attention and effort in order for it to grow. And as it grows, your love will only get better and better.

Nothing is ever perfect, but we must remember that to live and to love is to change and to grow. Growth is conditional - it only happens when we choose to embrace change one moment at a time.

“Change is inevitable. Growth is intentional.” - Glenda Cloud

Here are 8 ways to help your love grow stronger and thrive:

Practice gratitude

• Don’t take each other for granted. Keep note in your journal of the things you are grateful for each day, and the things you love about your partner. Or, practice gratitude openly together - one person shares what they are grateful for and then the other follows. When we practise gratitude daily, we begin to flourish.

Don’t be afraid to seek help and guidance from others

• Relationship counsellors are there for a reason - if you’re feeling at a standstill in your relationship or need some guidance, reach out to them. They can help unlock areas where you both might be struggling and provide a light through the darkness.

Give each other space

• In order to grow, we all need to have our own space at times. A suffocating relationship kills growth. Ensure you make time for YOU and self-care. We need freedom in the safety of a commitment.

Support each other

• Listen and don’t talk. Join them at sporting events, new business ventures, even on errands. We cannot do everything alone - it’s important to feel safe and supported by those closest to us. If you’re not sure where your partner needs extra support, ask them. Show up when they need you most.

Make time to talk about your relationship

• Communication is key. Speak openly and from your heart, without judgement or animosity. Everything and anything that is on your mind, any areas of your relationship where you’re struggling, or even areas where you’re thriving and what you’re loving most about each other - share it openly! We aren’t mind readers - we need to speak our feelings if we wish to grow.

Remind yourself often of why and how you fell in love 

• Tell old stories, look at old pictures, dig into keepsake memories and live, laugh and embrace those first magnetic embers of love and how they made you feel. It keeps the spark alive and is fuel for future growth.

Share adventures together

• Whether it’s a walk on the beach, traveling to a new destination, or discovering a new hobby, take pleasure in adventures together. Our lives can get so busy, but don’t forget to have fun together.

Keep track of your growth

• Growing a relationship is like anything else that holds value to us, we need to plan, set goals, work, and review.